"AAAAAH!!! YOU F*CKER!!!!"

This is a phrase often yelled by Craig during a hallucination. He is yelling it downstairs now as I write.

And it pretty much sums up everyones feelings about this disease. 

I should be putting my tax information together for the accountant, but his yelling is very distracting. It's difficult to concentrate. Even though I had doors installed to separate the house, Craig can yell quite loudly. Sunday he started yelling and screaming most all day and it continued off and on into Monday with little relief from his antihistamine PRN. His Dr. dropped by on Monday afternoon and after much discussion it was decided to increase his Seroquel a little further.   Tuesday he was better than I had seen him in almost a year. His language skills were improved, his motor skills were improved and he helped us when standing and changing him. He joined in conversations and laughed when I made a sarcastic remark to a newscast; showing that he was following the newscast and understood my meaning completely. It was startling. (No, I'm not attributing this behavior to Seroquel as the increase hadn't yet been started. Each day is just different from the other.)

Yesterday and today he is back to yelling. It can get so tiring. Very tiring. (Hours later he's calm and quiet and happy and alert again - thank you Fruiteze!) I am so thankful for the patience and love his caregivers have for him. They are remarkable. I am so grateful he sleeps peacefully through the night. Nights are truly miraculous. Whenever I go in to check on him he is always sweet and tender and very happy. I find that fascinating and extremely comforting. A great relief, beautiful moments, such a gift to have a microscopic glimpse of the "real Craig" every night. Thank you Jesus.

His Dr. couldn't be more pleased with his care and has said so often. He told us that Craig couldn't have a better end to his life; that he has the best quality of "end of life" that he possibly could have in his situation. I wouldn't have it any other way. 

We are so very blessed with those of you who surround us with love, hold us up in prayer with love and who visit as often as they can; and those who get me out of here for a few hours. What love!!! I can't do this without you. You are an instrument of God's work. In the utmost worst days of my life, God is here through you. Thank you for saying "yes Lord". Thank you for being in this with us. It makes a world of difference to us.

Sunny Saturday. He really enjoyed being in the sunshine again! As we watched the golfers Craig laughed heartily when his caregiver commented that swinging the golf club looked pretty easy. Hahahah!

P.S. Congratulations to my niece Erin who cares for Craig - she was married on Monday evening to her wonderful fiancè who also helps care for Craig and has helped us around the yard and house. Great catch, Erin!

Frankie, welcome to the family and thank you for all of your hard work! You are a very loving and precious addition to our family! 

I love you three so very much!